Writing Your Vows

Traditional Vows vs. Personal Vows

You imagined a scene from a movie, where you look into each other’s eyes and eloquently declare your love and commitment to each other in front of all your family and friends. However, your fiance is nervous about his writing skills, and the thought of wearing his heart on his sleeve in front of 200 guests makes him anxious. What should you do? Traditional vows take the pressure off writing and public speaking,  But let’s say you want more than an “I do” from each other. Here are essential wedding vow tips to help you decide the best way to declare your love and commitment.

Don’t Procrastinate.

Don’t wait till the last minute to discuss and decide vow choice. It is recommended to start writing your vows three weeks before the ceremony. This is plenty of time to talk and get to know each other’s concerns regarding vow choice.

Public Speaking.

If one of you are afraid to stand up and read your personal vows, then the traditional vows may be the route for you to go. Some couples edit the traditional vow choice to make the wording fresh and current. Consider this as an option. If you decide to do this, your officiant may want to see your word choice. So again, make sure you do these revisions three weeks before the ceremony to get your officiant’s blessing!

Write a Love Letter.

Some couples choose the traditional vow choice for the ceremony due to religious reasons, fear of public speaking, time constraints, or just not comfortable in wearing their heart on a sleeve in front of the world. But here’s another option, before the wedding ceremony, the bride and groom exchange love letters that convey their personal and deep commitment. Think of it as a private personal vow, just for your eyes only.

Private Personal Vow Gathering.

Some couples decide to state their personal vows before their wedding day. I know of a couple who went hiking, and when they reached the top of the mountain, they declare their personal vows. I also know of another couple who gathered their parents and siblings in the backyard and spoke their personal vows to those closest to them. In both cases, the couples wanted personal sentiments to be spoken in intimate settings and used traditional vows for the wedding day.

Dedicate to Customization.

If you are considering personal vows, then you must write out exactly what you are going to say and make sure you are comfortable in saying those words out loud. You may have to write a few drafts before you have the exact wording and sentiment. It’s okay to run it by a friend or a family member who can help you tweak the writing but remember, the love and sentiment must be your own. There are also a plethora of websites that offer tips on writing your own personal vows. A great resource when you encounter writer’s block! If you decided to edit your traditional vows to make them current and fresh, make sure you write them out exactly how you want to speak them and run them by your officiant so there is no confusion. Most officiants want to know ahead of time of any changes.

Handwritten Vows.

Don’t just write your vows on a piece of notebook paper. Consider a wedding vow book that you can purchase to handwrite your vows. These sweet booklets look fantastic in photos and are wonderful keepsakes that you will cherish for a lifetime.

Time Constraints.

Remember to keep your personal vows to 2-3 minutes. This is a perfect time constraint for the ceremony and your guests’ attention span.

If you don’t want to ugly cry.

This will probably happen whether you decide to repeat the vows after your officiant or whether you decided to write your own personal vows. So keep a handkerchief or a Kleenex available! Just remember, there is no right or wrong decision when it comes to vow choice. It comes down to how you feel as a couple and what makes you happy and comfortable.

Post Written By PKM

November 26, 2018

Writing Your Vows

Traditional Vows vs. Personal Vows

You imagined a scene from a movie, where you look into each other’s eyes and eloquently declare your love and commitment to each other in front of all your family and friends. However, your fiance is nervous about his writing skills, and the thought of wearing his heart on his sleeve in front of 200 guests makes him anxious. What should you do? Traditional vows take the pressure off writing and public speaking,  But let’s say you want more than an “I do” from each other. Here are essential wedding vow tips to help you decide the best way to declare your love and commitment.

Don’t Procrastinate.

Don’t wait till the last minute to discuss and decide vow choice. It is recommended to start writing your vows three weeks before the ceremony. This is plenty of time to talk and get to know each other’s concerns regarding vow choice.

Public Speaking.

If one of you are afraid to stand up and read your personal vows, then the traditional vows may be the route for you to go. Some couples edit the traditional vow choice to make the wording fresh and current. Consider this as an option. If you decide to do this, your officiant may want to see your word choice. So again, make sure you do these revisions three weeks before the ceremony to get your officiant’s blessing!

Write a Love Letter.

Some couples choose the traditional vow choice for the ceremony due to religious reasons, fear of public speaking, time constraints, or just not comfortable in wearing their heart on a sleeve in front of the world. But here’s another option, before the wedding ceremony, the bride and groom exchange love letters that convey their personal and deep commitment. Think of it as a private personal vow, just for your eyes only.

Private Personal Vow Gathering.

Some couples decide to state their personal vows before their wedding day. I know of a couple who went hiking, and when they reached the top of the mountain, they declare their personal vows. I also know of another couple who gathered their parents and siblings in the backyard and spoke their personal vows to those closest to them. In both cases, the couples wanted personal sentiments to be spoken in intimate settings and used traditional vows for the wedding day.

Dedicate to Customization.

If you are considering personal vows, then you must write out exactly what you are going to say and make sure you are comfortable in saying those words out loud. You may have to write a few drafts before you have the exact wording and sentiment. It’s okay to run it by a friend or a family member who can help you tweak the writing but remember, the love and sentiment must be your own. There are also a plethora of websites that offer tips on writing your own personal vows. A great resource when you encounter writer’s block! If you decided to edit your traditional vows to make them current and fresh, make sure you write them out exactly how you want to speak them and run them by your officiant so there is no confusion. Most officiants want to know ahead of time of any changes.

Handwritten Vows.

Don’t just write your vows on a piece of notebook paper. Consider a wedding vow book that you can purchase to handwrite your vows. These sweet booklets look fantastic in photos and are wonderful keepsakes that you will cherish for a lifetime.

Time Constraints.

Remember to keep your personal vows to 2-3 minutes. This is a perfect time constraint for the ceremony and your guests’ attention span.

If you don’t want to ugly cry.

This will probably happen whether you decide to repeat the vows after your officiant or whether you decided to write your own personal vows. So keep a handkerchief or a Kleenex available! Just remember, there is no right or wrong decision when it comes to vow choice. It comes down to how you feel as a couple and what makes you happy and comfortable.

Post Written By PKM

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